Why do nights like this come along? What a strange way to spend time. Did I need a day like this. Working so hard at something to have nothing to some for it. What would I have if I had nothing? More? Less? My feet need to get moving. They need to feel soil. I missed the sun. There is no moon. Nothing good happens after two. Nothing bad either. Just nothing. Thats what I need. Nothing.
Saturday, June 18, 2011
Thursday, June 9, 2011
Deja vu...
I could really use your help. I feel It again. But instead of feeling something, I feel like a plastic bag is being put over my head. The maté no longer brings me comfort, just stress. Draw and quartered by parables and stories. I find no comfort. This isn't what it was when you were here. Maybe I was drawn to you.
Thursday, June 2, 2011
12 Desperate straight lines
June 2nd, 2011 - 3:40 pm
Dreams and realities are blurring together.
i feel like i never wake up, or never go to sleep. i cant tell which.
My path is laid before me. Paved by experience and inadvertently swept clean and tidy by zealots. The path is clear now. I have the map and my feet have been hardened. I am just waiting on the toll booth attendant to accept my payment and allow me to start on my way.
Dreams and realities are blurring together.
i feel like i never wake up, or never go to sleep. i cant tell which.
My path is laid before me. Paved by experience and inadvertently swept clean and tidy by zealots. The path is clear now. I have the map and my feet have been hardened. I am just waiting on the toll booth attendant to accept my payment and allow me to start on my way.
Unintended Revelation
June 2nd, 2011 - 1:04 am
I'm aching...
My body aches. Lack of sleep. Fighting to keep my eyes open.
The knot in my neck seems to have been tied by the crew of a tall ship.
My mind aches. The swirling promise of good feelings is as flower petals caught in typhoon.
Anything swung so fiercely can be a hazard. The gashes on my consciousness can testify.
My soul aches. It is stitched so tightly to another. Kin of the spirit. now stretching across the world.
The fabric becomes warped and worn. Repairs will be necessary but the thread will remain stead fast.
Strain and Distance are but objects... and all is well
I'm aching...
My body aches. Lack of sleep. Fighting to keep my eyes open.
The knot in my neck seems to have been tied by the crew of a tall ship.
My mind aches. The swirling promise of good feelings is as flower petals caught in typhoon.
Anything swung so fiercely can be a hazard. The gashes on my consciousness can testify.
My soul aches. It is stitched so tightly to another. Kin of the spirit. now stretching across the world.
The fabric becomes warped and worn. Repairs will be necessary but the thread will remain stead fast.
Strain and Distance are but objects... and all is well
Wednesday, June 1, 2011
The Hangover.
June 1, 2011 - 7:47pm
I'm finally feeling sick...
I'm finally feeling sick...
it was only a matter of time. Four hours of sleep, Combined with working in the hot sun all day and heated discussions of the reality of mankind a night for three weeks strait takes a toll. I"m amazed that i haven't felt this terrible earlier. Every ounce of my being was focused on just getting to know this fascinating new person. I had no time to feel ill. But now that shes left, my body is giving in. I don't think any amount of mate can help me now...
Departure and Arrival.
June 1st, 2011 - 4:00am
And then she was gone....
As she turned the corner out of sight, the full realization hit me. You could have thought she had been my sister, they way her leaving tore me up inside. This girl from a foreign country, that I had only know for two weeks, just departed. Not knowing if i would ever see her again put me into a kind of haze. Ideas and consequences flowed through my head, and then realized that this was the beginning of the rest of my life. She is my inspiration to begin writing. Running on no sleep, and drowning in yerba mate, I will immortalize this moment in words and begin the rest of my life a changed man. This is how it all began. With the twelve tribes and the tall Spanish girl. She will forever be in my heart, and I vow I will see her once again.
And then she was gone....
As she turned the corner out of sight, the full realization hit me. You could have thought she had been my sister, they way her leaving tore me up inside. This girl from a foreign country, that I had only know for two weeks, just departed. Not knowing if i would ever see her again put me into a kind of haze. Ideas and consequences flowed through my head, and then realized that this was the beginning of the rest of my life. She is my inspiration to begin writing. Running on no sleep, and drowning in yerba mate, I will immortalize this moment in words and begin the rest of my life a changed man. This is how it all began. With the twelve tribes and the tall Spanish girl. She will forever be in my heart, and I vow I will see her once again.
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